Swine Flu Is Definitely Over This Time (Sort of)

The major drug companies have apparently milked the Swine Flu™ pandemic for all that they could, because the World Health Organization today declared that the "H1N1 virus has largely run its course." In a statement, the Director-General said the WHO's Emergency Committee decided on this during a conference call. Oh, but wait — they've left a little nugget of doubt to make sure everyone remains vigilant:

As we enter the post-pandemic period, this does not mean that the H1N1 virus has gone away. Based on experience with past pandemics, we expect the H1N1 virus to take on the behaviour of a seasonal influenza virus and continue to circulate for some years to come.

In the post-pandemic period, localized outbreaks of different magnitude may show significant levels of H1N1 transmission.

Forget it. We're all gonna die.

[Image via Getty]