Mitt Romney's Dirty Little Secret: He's Old

Many completely correct adjectives come to mind when you think of presidential frontrunner Willard "Mittens" Romney: Slick, gross, rich, cheesy, evil, hilarious, weird, and, especially, white. But no one ever talks about how old he is. Did you know he's kind of old?

Mitt Romney is a 64-year-old man. If he won the 2012 election, he would be inaugurated just short of his 66th birthday. This would make him the fourth oldest president ever to be inaugurated, behind only Ronald Reagan, William Henry Harrison, and, by one day if our math is correct, James Buchanan. Keep in mind, too, that William Henry Harrison popped off only a month into office! And Ronald Reagan, of course, may have gotten sort of Alzheimery during his second term. What? Don't get mad at us; his kid was the one who said it.

Now this is not to say that Mitt Romney's age should necessarily be a major concern for voters. Being 66 years old isn't quite the sign of imminent death that it used to be, thanks to modern medicine. Back in the 19th century, you'd hit 39, catch "the shivers" or whatever, and the doctor could only make a housecall to administer a desperate concoction of cat's liver, hard tack and eagle urine that would delay painful, painful death another week so Cousin Jeffers, a dirt prospector, could carriage-hitchhike his way in from the Dakotas in time for the funeral.

Still, you don't think of Mittens as potentially one of the oldest presidents in history. He seems more like he was already 54 when he popped out of the womb, immediately began downsizing paper corporations, and has stayed the same age ever since.

And yet he's kind of old.

[Image via AP]