"Oh boy, oh boy," freshman Senator Marco Rubio thought to himself, escorting Nancy Reagan through the Reagan Library. "I'm in the inner sanctum now. Handpicked by Nancy Reagan to deliver a speech, walking down this aisle like husband and wife. Best damn photo op of my life! Oh, wait, gotta smile."

"Best side to the camera, old boy. Better not fuck this one uh— Wha?— Noooooooo! I dropped her! I dropped Nancy Reagan! This bitch is 90 fucking years old, and if she kicks the bucket now, I will never live it down! Get back on your feet, you dumb cooze! Get! On! Your! Feet!"

"Whew. Got her. Now shake it off, old boy. Doing great. Doing fine. Heir apparent to Reagan Republicanism. Best damn photo op of my life." [My Fox Tampa Bay]