Scientist 'Gobsmacked' At Disappearance of Major Greenland Glacier

The great Texas Governor Rick Perry has smartly aligned himself with Galileo Galilei, that Renaissance maverick who famously took on the scourge known as "the scientific community." And we could surely use Galileo's science-debunking savvy now more than ever, huh, Rick? What with Dr. Alun Hubbard — who purports to be a "leading glaciologist" (whatever THAT is) — claiming that Greenland's Petermann Glacier has all but melted away faster than anyone could ever have predicted.

Located in north west Greenland, the Petermann Glacier accounts for 6% of the area of the Greenland ice sheet, said Dr Hubbard. [...]

"Although I knew what to expect in terms of ice loss from satellite imagery, I was still completely unprepared for the gob-smacking scale of the break-up, which rendered me speechless," said Dr Hubbard. "It's like looking into the Grand Canyon full of ice and coming back two years later to find it's full of water."

Oh, whatever, Hubbard. Show us some hard proof, Mr. Wizard! Fine, so you actually traveled to the glacier via helicopter to analyze the time-lapse cameras and GPS sensors you set up there in the summer of 2009, which produced these chilling images of what would appear to be a giant, watery harbinger of our impending, hellish doom. You call that proof? That's not proof! Greenland isn't even mentioned anywhere in the New Testament! Plus who even needs glaciers, anyway? They have some awesome, state-of-the-art indoor skating rinks all over Texas that work just fine, thank you very much. Hopefully the fires won't get to them anytime soon. [BBC, images via Dr. Alun Hubbard/Greenpeace]