Why does Rick Perry actually do to prepare for his debates? He should prepare more, because he's terrible at them.

The clip up top was the most comically butchered attack of last night's Fox News/Google debate. Perry was trying to explain that Mitt Romney is a flip-flopper. THAT'S NOT VERY HARD TO PROVE. You should memorize it before the debate and then just say it! Instead, we got:

PERRY: "I think Americans just don't know sometimes which Mitt Romney they're dealing with. Is it the Mitt Romney that was on the side of…against…the Second Amendment before he was for the Second Amendment…was it was..before he was before these social programs, uh, from the standpoint he was standing, uh, for Roe vs. Wade before he was against Roe, uh, Roe vs. Wade…uh…he was…uh for Race To The Top…

Uh…[pause]…he's for Obamacare and now he's against it…I mean, we'll wait until tomorrow and, and, and wait to see which Mitt Romney we're really talking to…

Ka-boom, Mitt Romney! Wait, what? Mitt Romney may be, uh, for, uh, before, the, uh, before these social programs, uh, from standpoints of standing, uh, sure, but at least he speaks his lies in the English language!



And here he is babbling about Pakistan. Yeah, it's a bit of a bad-television question: What would be your first move if Pakistan lost control of its nuclear weapons to the Taliban? The correct answer is "talk to my fucking national security experts," but you can't really say in a debate. Still, couldn't he have cooked up something a bit more than (paraphrasing) (barely) "Well uh you've got to uh... Mike Mullen said something about terrorists the other day... and India! We have to be allies with them. Sell them jets and stuff, also, Taiwan, also."

Perry's last debate moment saw him explaining how he'd take Newt Gingrich and Herman Cain and "mate them up" as their Vice President. Okay, it was the jokey part at the end of the debate, so it doesn't matter. But he still said "Newt Gingrich" "Herman Cain" and "mate" in the same sentence, which is gross.

Top Republican pundits including Bill Kristol, Rich Lowry, Erick Erickson, Dana Perino, Byron York, Michelle Malkin and others are all kind of done with Rick Perry — for at least another few days until he says something they like, and they all forget about this, as pundits do.