Last night I was busy hanging out with a boy and watching Terra Nova so I didn't watch The A List. Instead I ran into Dustin & Jayden, Manhattan's most obnoxious homosexuals, this morning after they woke up on a bench in the 57th Street NRQ station. Here's what they had to say.
"Girl, that sure was a party."
"We haven't partied like that in a minute."
"I know and we partied for no reason."
"It wasn't no reason we were at the pre-launch soft opening for a new brand of FlavaWater brought to you by Pensoil, Advil+, and Edwing Couture."
"Why's everyone got to have a reason to party?"
"What are you talking about?"
"Even with out the facial hair?"
"Ok, love. Well, she had a blog party and there was no blogging."
"That's like when we went to that Karl Lagerfeld ice cream bar party and there was no ice cream."
"What, fatty, do you expect Karl to actually eat?"
"Sorry, you're right."
"Then Rod-i-ney had his calendar party."
"That's not what he was calling it."
"Sorry, Rod-i-ney has a calendars parfy. And then Derek had her spraytan with no vowels party."
"Yes, girl, so many parties for so many stupid things. And what did they do at these parties?"
"They had stupid fights about Austin."
"Were they arguing about how fat she is?"
"No about how many hot dogs she can eat in a minute."
"Girl, there have been plenty of hot dogs in that hallway!"
"Right, everyone's all mad that she and Jake cheated on each other."
"Girl, all them bitches need to get something else to talk about, Okrrrr."
"The only other thing they can talk about is Nanooshna."
"Trust, it's true. Austin, Nanooshna, Austin, Nanooshna, Austin, Nanooshna."
"They need something to really fight about."
"Like boxers or briefs."
"Water based or silicone based."
"Like a Virgin or Ray of Light."
"Oh, Like a Virgin better work! And please there is only one thing worth fighting over."
"The the last bit of blow, honey!"
"God, these people are so boring."
"I know, honey, we need to get some new people to talk about."