Today Is the Last Day to Have Sex with an Animal in Florida—Legally

Today is the last day that you can legally fuck an animal in Florida. At the stroke of midnight on October 1st, the Sunshine State's new anti-bestiality law goes into effect, forbidding "sexual contact" and "sexual conduct" with "animals." (So it might be illegal to have sex with other humans, too. Molds and fungi, however, are fair game.) Floridians: How do you plan to spend these precious final hours of legal bestiality?

Starting tomorrow, if you "knowingly" sex up a member of Kingdom Animalia for a reason other than "accepted animal husbandry practices, confirmation judging practices, or accepted veterinary medical practices," it will be a misdemeanor. Somewhere, a famous dolphin sex memoirist is weeping. [Broward Palm Beach New Times, FLRules, image via Shutterstock]