Romance-defiling reality hag Patti Stanger has been shilling hard for Sensa — "the weight-loss system" you "sprinkle on your food" (active ingredient: 100% horseshit) — on commercials that run during her Bravo reality show, Millionaire Matchmaker. Well, a reader who gave Sensa a shot wrote in to share her experiences with the miracle product, and we thought we would in turn share them with you.
You cannot buy the product outright, you actually commit to a monthly charge of about $90. I thought I would try the two month trial and return it if I was not happy. Three weeks later, it seemed dumb. It made my food taste weird, made my breath smell, and I did not notice any change in appetite or lbs.
I called to return it and I was barraged with a list of hoops that are not advertised to try to quit and return the product. The "weight-loss consultant" for returns kept me on the phone for such a long time, its seemed as if it were a battle of wills. She said she would mark my record as "unwilling to commit to the program," and was I OK with that?
I plainly stated I wanted to return and wanted a return confirmation code. She would not give it to me outright. I had to go through all my personal information again. I had to sustain a speech on how it worked. I kept on repeating I was on my lunch break and had to make it quick. She refused. She eventually started reading me a return address.
She then said I had to return it within seven days, with the cancellation number written in large letters outside the package. And I had to return all four shakers. (So for those of you that used one already and tossed it, you are out of luck!) She also said I should send it with delivery confirmation and was responsible for all mailing costs, for my "possible cancellation."
While the business practices our reader describes seem less than savory, we'd hardly put the burden of blame on Stanger. In fact, it's those same, you-try-it-you-own-it-forever policies that have made her matchmaking service such an astounding success. I mean, come on — zero happy couples and counting speaks for itself!