Laura Chavez, a 60 year-old New Mexican, was drinking and playing a nice game of Monopoly with her grandson and her boyfriend, Clyde "Butch" Smith. When Chavez suspected Smith of cheating, she sent her grandson to bed and proceeded to hit Smith over the head with a bottle and then stabbed him repeatedly with a kitchen knife.
Yes, the fight broke out over Monopoly, probably because he was trying to take all the Free Parking money and Chavez was all, "There is no such thing as Free Parking money. This is craziness!" People have been fighting over Free Parking for ages!
Smith was covered in cuts to his head and wrist and was hospitalized, but is in stable condition. When police got to the scene, they found Chavez under her porch covered in blood. They asked her if it was Smith's blood and she said, "Yes. I fucked him up." Well, she might not be passing go, collecting $200, or taking a ride on the Pennsylvania Railroad, but she at least deserves a free trip to the electric company for such an awesome answer.