Hug-Hating School Suspends Touchy Teen for Innocent Embrace

The War on Hugs continues apace in America's prison-schools, with panicked administrators enforcing no-hugging policies to ensure that their youthful charges don't injure each other—or worse. The latest casualties are 14-year-old Florida middle schooler Nickolas Martinez and his female friend, who just received a one-day in-school suspension for hugging on school grounds. Have they no shame?

"Heading to my class, I see my friend and I just hug her," explains Martinez, who as an honors student should know better. "Then the principal yells from behind me 'come over here' and we both go to the dean's office and he writes us up for in school suspension." During the suspension period the girl began having abdominal pains; a school nurse later confirmed that she was pregnant with Martinez's baby, who had been conceived during the brief hallway hug. Later it was discovered that all of the students who had witnessed the hug had also become pregnant.

Martinez's mom, who probably voted for Obama, doesn't believe that the hug was inappropriate, and believes the school should modify its rules so that students aren't punished for showing that they care for each other in innocent ways. School administrators aren't interested in doing that. "Our focus is on learning; therefore, we cannot discriminate or make an opinion on what is an appropriate hug, what's not an appropriate hug," a school spokesperson told Fox News. "What you may think is appropriate, another person may view as inappropriate."

Students suspended for hugging: MyFoxORLANDO.com

If we ran a prison-school, we'd declare all forms of interaction between students as "inappropriate," including talking. Then there would never be any confusion, or unplanned teen pregnancies.

[My Fox Orlando]