If Alexander Pratt and Clara Pearson were ever to write an illustrated manual together, they should call it The Joyride of Sex. On Thursday night the feisty twosome allegedly stole a Honda Civic so they could have a quickie. Sadly, they never got the chance.
After sharing a romantic pre-coital dinner (we presume) at a convenience store*, the couple allegedly spotted the Civic running and with its doors unlocked, hopped in, and drove away. Alas, the car belonged to the Palm Beach County Sheriff's Office, so the couple didn't get very far before the authorities caught up with them and arrested them on grand theft auto charges. They were then hauled off to the County Jail, which lacked heart-shaped hot tubs.
According to the affidavit, the Palm Beach Post reports, "Pratt told deputies he knew the car was stolen but didn't regret it because he wanted to 'go to have intimate relations with Pearson.'" (In the Anthology of Illicit Car Tryst Quotes, that's right up there with "I'm fucking this chick." Not as sexxxy, but definitely sweeter.) If loving his lady in a stolen car is wrong, then Pratt (allegedly) doesn't want to be right.
* The fastest way to a woman's bed—or backseat—is the Slim Jim-and-peanut-pack combo. Most potent aphrodisiacs ever, those.