Election Night 2011: Good News for Once

Just one year after getting used as Pine Sol by Republicans in the midterms, Democrats and progressives came back to score a bunch of victories in the 2011 elections—in particular, two important ballot measures in Ohio and Mississippi. Here's a roundup of election night news:

  • Probably the best news of the night came out of Mississippi, where the heinous "Personhood Amendment"—which defined "life" as "every human being from the moment of fertilization, cloning or the functional equivalent thereof"—was defeated. (Lt. Gov. Phil Bryant had previoulsy said that if the amendment failed, "Satan Wins"; Bryant won the gubernatorial race on Tuesday night.) Not only would the initiative effectively outlawed abortion, even in the cases of rape and incest, it also would have likely rendered IUDs and in-vitro fertilization illegal. Watch for my "personhood amendment," which defines life as "any being, of any dimensionality, whose energy field is controlled or affected by crystals," on ballots across the country next year. [NYT]
  • In Ohio, voters delivered a slap to the face of Gov. John Kasich by voting yes on the "Slap John Kasich in His Stupid Face" bill as expected. Actually, no, the slap to the face was metaphorical: 61 percent to 39 percent, Ohioans voted down a stupid collective-bargaining law, championed by the governor, that limited the power of the state's public unions. Kasich, who personally lobbied for the bill and sacrificed nearly a dozen rams in its name atop Columbus' famous jeweled ziggurat, said that he would "spend some time to reflect on what happened here." [Cleveland.com]
  • A shadowy cabal of gays in Maine managed to restore same-day voter registration, which allows residents to register to vote as late as election day, unless they were belligerents in the French and Indian War. [AP]
  • Democrat Steve Beshear easily cruised to re-election as Kentucky's governor, running on his record of balancing the budget, creating jobs, and remembering the name of his home state when playing the 50 states game, which is something not many of us can do, see also: Indiana. [CNN]
  • In Virginia, Republicans appear to have taken control of the State Senate, giving them partial immunity in the next physical challenge. [WaPo]

[image via AP]