The "personhood" movement is a grassroots campaign in Mississippi that sought to pass a constitutional amendment defining a person as a "fertilized egg," thereby giving uni-celled beings a slew of valuable new rights that would make their elimination, via morning-after pill or what have you, tantamount to murder in the first degree.

Well, not even Mississippi was ready for such a prospect, it turns out, as the AP has declared the measure did not pass in Tuesday's election. Better luck next time, personhooders! Maybe shoot for four cells next time. Or eight? Eight seems substantial and person-y. [WashPo, Screengrab via]