What If Everyone Involved in This Penn State Scandal Were Black?

It's times like this—when a "hero" beloved for not-quite-justified reasons meets a scandalous end, and college kids start rioting in the streets over sports, not social justice—when we, as a nation, need to sit back, take a deep collective breath, and ask ourselves: "Can you imagine if everyone involved in this thing were black?"

JERRY SANDUSKY, FOOTBALL COACH AND CHILD MOLESTER: "Monster. Sickening. Monster. Monster of inhuman monsters. One million years buried beneath the jail is not long enough for this monster. One second is too long to wait for this monster's lethal injection. I say lethally inject him, throw him in solitary, and don't let his dead body out for a million and one years." (To be fair, people may feel like this about white Jerry Sandusky also! At least until his teary Dateline jailhouse interview airs, and time softens the outrage, and everyone remembers those great defenses he coached.)

JOE PATERNO, HEAD COACH FOR LIFE AT PENN STATE AND PENNSYLVANIA'S MOST POPULAR MAN, FOR SOME REASON: Monster. Damn near as bad as the monster molester himself. Why didn't he do more...something... anything to stop that monster? I know why. Those types always stick together.

ALL THE PENN STATE STUDENTS WHO RIOTED AT THE ANNOUNCEMENT OF PATERNO'S FIRING: Jesus Christ. Thugs. Animals. Can you believe these thugs, burning and looting to protect their great hero, a common criminal? College kids, my ass. Let's call them what they are: thugs. Perhaps it was rash for the police to shoot those three, but come on. Act like thugs, get treated like thugs.

Of course if Penn State were a black school, none of this would have been a huge national story anyhow. In post-racial America, HBCU football sucks. Go Bison!

[Photo via AP]