Kris Humphries Hires Lawyer as Publicist Claims Wedding Was StagedS

Kris Humphries hired a divorce lawyer, so it looks like the Kardashian wedding is finally over! But was it ever "real"? Meanwhile, Angelina and Brad hit up Vietnam. Saturday gossip is letting steak sauce drip down its chin.

  • Kris Humphries, seen here ruining my neighborhood, has hired a lawyer to represent him during his divorce from Kim Kardashian. It's the same guy who repped him during the negotiations over the prenup. TMZ writes that the divorce will be "easy as pie" because literally the only thing the couple owns is pies. Millions of pies. Even their house is made of pies! And more importantly because the prenup is clear about who gets what (pies). [TMZ]
  • Meanwhile, publicist Jonathan Jaxksxcson is telling anyone who will listen that the Kardashian-Humphries wedding was fake, or staged, or whatever. But what does "fake" even mean, in this context? It's an interesting question, if you're in college. [Daily Mail]
  • Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt visited Vietnam for the first time since 2007, when they parachuted into the jungle, uncovered evidence of a American prisoners of war, single handedly took out a Soviet-Vietnamese military operation, and adopted some kid. [NYDN]
  • James Franco did another art. Don't make us talk about it, okay? [Page Six]
  • Holly Marie Combs is getting divorced from her husband David Donoho. You know what they say! "Sometimes, people get divorced." It's a common saying. [People]
  • Ever wondered what Miley Cyrus' boyfriend Liam Hemsworth thinks is sexy? Wonder no more: "When I look over at her when she's biting into a steak sandwich and there is some steak sauce dripping down her chin, there is nothing sexier than that," he told the New York Post. If he thinks that's sexy, what about this? [Takes off shirt, puts handful of goldfish into mouth, chews, sticks tongue out, lets resulting paste dribble out of corners of mouth] [Page Six]
  • Jerry O'Connell and Rebecca Romijn renewed their vows yesterday (11/11/11) at 11:11 a.m. on 11th St. and 11th Ave. (so, like, Gansevoort, I guess?), thereby opening a portal into dreaded "Number Hell" that can only be closed by a mysterious figure known as "The Mathemagician." [People]
  • Juelz Santana has been arrested for "making terrorist threats." Was he threatening to release another album, ha ha, but seriously, what? He's a member of the Diplomats, for Christ's sake. All of their raps are about diplomacy and protocol. [TMZ]

[image via AP]