When 33-year-old Zainab Bibi of Pakistan allegedly killed her husband Ahmad Abbas, she had an excellent plan to dispose of his body: cook him. Unfortunately, either Bibi is a bad cook, or Abbas was a bad source of meat.

Or so we have to assume, based on the fact that the authorities only became involved when neighbors "detected a foul odor in the neighborhood, police said." Bibi is accused of colluding with her 22-year-old nephew to stab Abbas to death, cut him into pieces, and cook them; if nothing else, her (stated) motive was noble:

In an interview broadcast late Thursday, she claimed to have killed her husband because he wanted a physical relationship with their daughter — and said she did not regret her actions.

"I killed my husband before he dared to touch my daughter," she told ARY News.

Next time, use more spices.