Oh No—Kourtney Kardashian Is Pregnant Again

Kourtney Kardashian of the French reality show "Les Kardashiennes" is with child for the second time to Scott Disick, the 99 Cents Only store's answer to Patrick Bateman. Gah, why does she let that creepy guy keep touching her? Oh yes, because he's the ElephantPenis Man. Sigh.

Timing-wise, the fetus's arrival is perfect for all sorts of personal-professional reasons. News of its immaculate conception will distract the angry plebes from Sister Kim's post-marital rows and woes, and possibly help the Kardashians win back angry, baby-loving fans of their teevee show. Secondly, Kourtney just started a new mommy blog on E!, and the new baby will help her generate content.

[US Magazine, Image via AP]