Sexy Mutants Have Penises in Eyes and Nose, Vagina 'Above Waist,' Says Magazine

No longer content to obsess about the genital structures between your legs, Cosmopolitan magazine has now uncovered an "above-the-waist G-spot" in females, an "eye erection" capacity in males, and a secret penis in the tip of a man's nose. Is this a fetish or something? An evolution of acrotomophilia, perhaps?

Readers, do you have genitals in unusual places? Do your lovers have testicles dangling from their earlobes? Labia on their backs? Do you wish they were afflicted with these mutations? And don't give me any of that "sexiest body part is the brain" bullshit. What do you think this is, the backseat of your mom's station wagon on prom night? We're talking about surprise genitals today. Supernumary sex holes and bonus mucus membranes. Hottest accessories for fall.