What If Donald Trump Held a Debate But the Candidates Didn't Show up?

Keep in mind is that Donald Trump has already won. He got the opportunity to moderate a presidential debate right before primary season, and two candidates have already accepted. To get even one candidate to accept an invitation to something so blindingly stupid and farcical would've been a once-in-a-generation political feat. Nevertheless, it's possible that the final head count may stop at two debaters, leaving the debate well short of maximum comedic capacity.

Newt Gingrich and Rick Santorum are the two candidates who've accepted — Gingrich because he and Trump are now business partners in the child labor sector, and Santorum just because he's happy to be invited to anything.

As for everyone else: Jon Huntsman and Ron Paul immediately declined and mocked their invitations. Michele Bachmann still hasn't made a decision. Not because she's disgusted by the nature of this humiliating clown show, though — she simply "fears that Donald Trump might be too biased in favor of one GOP candidate." Rick Perry's team has stayed silent too. It'd be nice to chat with his good birther buddy Donald Trump again, sure, but on the other hand, it's a debate, a format at which Rick Perry sucks.

Missing someone, are we? He's the subject of hot breaking political news!

Mitt Romney will not be attending the upcoming Republican presidential debate moderated by Donald Trump, citing scheduling conflicts.

"No, I'm not participating in that," Romney said Tuesday during an interview with Fox News. "The rest of the month is going to be spent campaigning … we'll be hitting the trail."

Romney said he called Trump earlier Tuesday to tell him that he would be unable to participate.

"He understood my perspective and wished me well," the former Massachusetts governor said.

Ha, "understood my perspective and wished me well," sure. You didn't believe him, did you Mittens? Because Donald Trump will be on all three cable news networks within the next 24 hours calling you a fraud and Hitler.

[Image via AP]