TrendAlertWatch! Criminals are stupider than ever. Hot on the heels of the Anthony Miranda affair — the guy who tried to hold up a UFC fighter and wound up with a face like a turnip and a hole in his leg — comes the tale of marauding brainiac Timothy Randall Clark, who chose to shoplift at a Maryland Wal-Mart during their annual "Shop with a Cop" Day. ("Shop with a Cop" Day is a community program that brings law enforcement and needy children together for a fun afternoon of shopping and gun-cleaning demonstrations. Or something like that. I don't know! This is America.)
Loss prevention officers at the Wal-Mart on Acton Lane saw a man in a back room cutting open packages of video games and game accessories and stuffing them inside his clothes. As the suspect walked towards the door, Charles County officers in the store were alerted and grabbed the suspect in the parking lot.
Clark had on his person 26 PlayStation and Xbox games, two controllers, and various other video game accessories tucked inside his pants and sweatshirt. He was arrested immediately, strung up, and turned into a human pinata to the delight of a small horde of baseball-bat-wielding youngsters in need. I do declare this to be another "Shop with a Cop" Day success! Yay! [myfoxdc, Photo via Flickr]