Demi Moore Is Not Changing Her Twitter Handle, Goddamnit!

The first thing everyone on the internet—or everyone on Twitter, at least—remarked when Demi Moore announced her divorce from dangling Chad Ashton Kutcher was, "What is she going to do about her Twitter handle?!" Moore has been known as @MrsKutcher for years, what will she do now? Nothing, so stop asking!

She bitchily broke her silence on the matter with this curt remark, "changing my twitter name isn't a top priority right now. sorry it bothers so many of u. should I not tweet until I do? does it really matter?" Apparently the other thing she can't be bothered with is the shift key.

Since we're stuck with @MrsKutcher for now, can we talk about changing something else? How about the background on your Twitter page, Demi? It's supposed to be a photo of you, but the posts block out your face so all we see when we visit your tweets is you shoving your crotch through our computer screen. You didn't star in Basic Instinct and we'd rather you not pretend that you did. How about a picture of flowers or kittens or Ashton with his eyes gouged out and a villain mustache drawn on his face? You know, something cheerful.

[Image via Getty]