Any Jokes About Starbucks' Blonde Roast Will Result in a 'Written Offense'

How excited are we all about Starbucks™' new Blonde Roast™? Right? We don't even need to explicate that one. The real question is, how excited are the Starbucks™ team member associate partner barista family members, who have the privilege of handing over the bags of the new Blonde Roast™ to enthusiastic customers like us?

On Jim Romenesko's Starbucks Gossip site, the answer is revealed: they're so freaking excited that the company will fine them if they make any jokes about the new Blonde Roast™:

we were told at a Regional Rally there are absolutely no Blonde jokes to be told around the coffee what so ever. It will be a written offense if so. This came right from the [Regional Director]'s mouth to about 100 [Store Managers] so communicate back to our stores at our own meetings.

Don't worry, that Blonde joke was about the girl at the register. The blonde one, selling the shitty coffee.

[Starbucks Gossip]