Facebook Will Read Your Private Thoughts For Politico's Benefit

Facebook has issued another exciting edict on how your personal data will be used, announcing a partnership in which your private status messages and comments are mined for political sentiment. The information is then passed in statistical form exclusively to Politico for that site's trademark analysis. Don't worry about opting out, because that's impossible.

The program "may alarm some people," writes Liz Gannes of All Things D, but "Facebook and Politico say the entire process is automated and no Facebook employees read the posts." So don't worry: Facebook doesn't actually care about your private feelings, it just wants to exploit them.

The really nice thing about having no human eyes on this data is that Facebook can't do quality control. So if you're pissed off about this ridiculous misappropriation of private conversations, we urge you to fight back in the easiest possible way: Update your status to say you're really like that Huntsman fellow. Remember, there's no "h" in the "Jon." And if you need to take a couple of drinks before you can bring yourself to hit "post," no one will judge.