Newt Gingrich is running yet another attack ad on Mitt Romney in South Carolina, this time simply throwing spaghetti at the wall: He's donated to Democrats, voted for a Democrat once, loves abortion, yadda yadda yadda. Also, Mitt Romney is John Kerry, in that they are both from Massachusetts, where the official language is French. Watch Mitt Romney speak French in 2002, like a fool.

But of course Newt Gingrich, while most likely doing recon for his eventual plan to take over the world, lived in France between the ages of 14 and 16 — just long enough to pick up some of the enemy language himself, according to a biography (via Foreign Policy):

In the book, author Mel Steely tells how Gingrich lived for several months in a hotel while he attended an American high school. Later he and his family went to live in a chateau in the Loire valley.

Newt "had enough French to survive" when he would go off exploring the city on his own, the author said.

According to the Gawker Almanac of American Politics (to be written), having "enough French to survive" at some point in your teens is enough to put you in league with America's worst enemies.

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And to compound the problem, here's Gingrich apologizing in Spanish a few years ago after referring to it as "the language of living in the ghetto." For shame.