Last week, a California man attempted to murder his wife in the most barbaric way possible: by poisoning her Rice Krispies with, of all things, Goof Off. Because he used the most obviously toxic-smelling household product and apparently filled the bowl with it, his wife of course noticed she was eating poison and went to the hospital. Fernando Porras, the husband, did not become a suspect until he left hospital grounds for a cigarette and never retuned. He is currently being held on $1 million bail.
When reached for comment, here's what the police had to say:
"It is an unusual case," Sergeant Dewayne Eldridge told KCAL. "We normally don't get cases such as this."