Meet Scarlett Johansson's Boob-Obsessed, Non-Celebrity Boyfriend

Meet Nate Naylor. He's a New York ad executive, and for the last five months he has been dating Scarlett Johansson. How did this mere mortal manage to capture a celebrity in the finely knit butterfly net of his love? Come, let us obsessively scrutinize everything about this man's life, because he is dating someone famous.

Everything you need to know about Nate Naylor:

  • He's an ad executive, "more artist than businessman." His website describes his job as "creative/art director" with accounts like Coca-Cola, Nike, Heineken, and Comedy Central.
  • He has a Tumblr, which he updates often. Most recent post: video of punk band the Anti-Nowhere League.
  • Meet Scarlett Johansson's Boob-Obsessed, Non-Celebrity BoyfriendNate Naylor likes boobs, butts, and vaginas. Here are all the boobs, butts, and vaginas he posted on his Tumblr in the last month. (Click to expand.) Having seen this, I'm setting the odds for another ScarJo naked picture scandal at 3:2.
  • He is 38 years old, which is 11 years ScarJo's senior. Compared to the last guy, he's a spring chicken.
  • Meet Scarlett Johansson's Boob-Obsessed, Non-Celebrity BoyfriendHe has a funny drunk face. [image via Billy Farrell Agency]
  • He has been dating ScarJo for a reported five months. He was her date to the afterparty for the We Bought a Zoo premiere. You can tell ScarJo loves him, because she didn't force him to attend the screening.
  • He's from Phoenix, Arizona.
  • He is "an avid art collector and has lots of famous friends in the New York art world. He and Scarlett have had dinner with the fashion photographer Terry Richardson a few times. Nate's not impressed by Scarlett's celebrity at all, and she loves that."
  • When Nate Naylor walks around New York with Scarlett, he holds her hand.
  • He is "the most beautiful man I've ever seen" according to another ad exec. "He basically looks like Morrissey in his prime," "great guy," "really respected," "Scarlett should be so lucky." Nate Naylor could get so many free blowjobs from this ad exec, but I bet he doesn't, because he is a Johansssexual.
  • Please do not confuse Scarlett Johansson's Nate Naylor with Lincoln, Nebraska's Nate Naylor; Fairfax, Virginia's Nate Naylor; or Bronx High School's Nate Naylor. Those Nate Naylors are a pharmacy clerk at Walgreen's; the Deputy Assistant Secretary for Public Affairs at U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs; and a teenager, respectively. They are not dating Scarlett Johansson, as far as we can tell.
  • Meet Scarlett Johansson's Boob-Obsessed, Non-Celebrity BoyfriendThough Scarlett Johansson's Nate Naylor is a "normal," he has had physical contact with the celebrity kind before. Here he is with actress Kristen Johnston at a theater benefit. He must have a special enzyme in his body that prevents him from combusting upon contact with a celebrity, as you or I would. [image via Getty]