Nicest Kidnappers Ever Served Tea, Dried Fruit


If you're going to get kidnapped, do your best to get kidnapped by these guys: an armed group of Bedouin tribesmen held two California women captive for a few hours, during which time they served up food and good conversation. Seriously. The AP story makes these guys sound like people I would hang out with willingly.

Their kidnappers gave them tea and dried fruit, and talked about religion and tribal rights. The California women were allowed to bring their Egyptian tour guide with them. One even put out his cigarette in the car when a hostage said the smoke was bothering her.

I have friends who are way less considerate than that. I'd feel a little guilty talking up these kidnappers if they'd actually done anything to the women — but they didn't rob or harm them. In fact, the lives of the "victims" may have been changed for the better.

"All of this is an unforgettable memory," Norma Supe, a 63-year-old nurse from Union City, Calif., told The Associated Press. "Maybe God had a purpose for this. It was probably to encourage more faith in me."

Are you kidding me? This story is the anti-Babel. Maybe, despite all of our differences, we're really all the same. Maybe Brad Pitt and Cate Blanchett just had really shitty luck that one time. Either way, this so-called kidnapping has charmed me. I don't know if all Bedouin tribesmen are this friendly and considerate, but for the sake of my warm and fuzzy feelings, I'll go ahead and believe that they are.

The kidnappers stopped, made a fire for the women to stay warm and made the women coffee. But Ganal does not drink coffee.

"So they made me tea," she said. The women were also served pita bread, dates and other dried fruit.

Sigh. No one ever takes care of me like that. What does a guy have to do to get kidnapped?

[Image via Shutterstock]