Well, this is very awful. This is "Drunk Text," Paris Hilton's "latest" single and a collaboration with the house music production duo Manufactured Superstars.
Remember "Stars are Blind"? It turns out they're also often tone deaf, and so Hilton has done us all a favor (of sorts) and recorded what is essentially a spoken word song. Some sample lyrics, if you'd rather save four minutes of your life, which I did not make up:
- "It was just a drunk text/In my head I was writing a fiction of us."
- "My mouth kept pouring desperate clauses of random intent."
- "And I say, 'Sure.'"
- "I'm too lazy to type, so I send a photo I took up a dancer's skirt."
- "No one is safe in the Twittersphere anymore."
- "It's a hot mess of misspelled obscenities, body parts, and run-on questions."
- "She's like, 'this guy wants you to wet your lips with this bottle.'"
- "Are you fucking kidding me?"
We also received statements from both Hilton's spokesperson and from Manufactured Superstars.
"We can confirm that the video leaked today is not part of Paris Hilton's new album," Hilton's rep says. "This video was recorded over a year ago. The first single will be out in a few months, we will let everyone know when it's due for release."
Manufactured Superstars says that Hilton did the video "as a favor for us," but that it won't be on the new album. "This is an unfinished rough-cut, which was not ready for release. We're looking into what happened and removing the illegal copies from the web. We've heard some songs from her new record which are incredible and are really going to surprise people."
[Image via Getty]