It's been some time since we were bombarded by a perfect pop song, and even longer since we've been bombarded by a perfect pop song from a young Canadian pop idol, but 26-year-old Carly Rae Jepsen has fulfilled both world shortages with a single, maddeningly addicting song: "Call Me Maybe."
If you're under the age of, say, 17—or otherwise tuned into the world of burgeoning pop stars—you've probably had this on repeat since mid-February, when tween royalty Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez and their friends put on fake mustaches and danced around someone's McMansion. They made a video that now has 20 million views on YouTube.
But for the rest of us (especially outside of Canada, where it's already been certified platinum), Jepsen Mania has only just begun. And the girl deserves it: She's recorded a flawless pop song. It's been out since September, but we're fast approaching the phase in which we will be virtually incapable of escaping the song and its strident disco strings and that horribly catchy hook. Resistance is futile, people: As much as I want to hate this song, I have listened to it seven times today (maybe more like 10 times) and I am not yet sick of it.
Jepsen signed with Bieber-maker Scooter Braun's label Schoolboy Records last month, after Justin heard the song on the radio and told Braun it was "the best pop song out there." That's like Michael Jordan ceding his title to Kobe.
The Canadian Pop Conglomerate Illuminati Society has officially been formed. Look out for this one.