Students at an Iowa high school got a strange surprise at an assembly last week when what had promised to be a (probably pretty boring) presentation about bullying and making good choices took the Christian NuMetal express train to Crazytown.

Leading the assembly was Minnesota-based Christian rock band Junkyard Prophet, a group closely affiliated with You Can Run But You Cannot Hide International (abbreviated to the still laughably long YCRBYCHI), a Christian youth ministry.

You Can Run But You Cannot Hide International (YCRBYCHI) was recently listed as an anti-gay hate group by the Southern Poverty Law Center.


Turns out school officials didn't know that.


In the clip above, Junkyard Prophet frontman (and drummer) Preacher Bradlee Dean uses his sweet assembly platform to drop some serious anti-gay and anti-choice messages on his captive student audience. (That's captive in the literal sense; according to witnesses, kids who walked out during the presentation were shouted at and ridiculed for behaving disrespectfully.)

In addition to informing his young listeners that most gay men will die by age 42, Dean also spends a couple minutes analyzing the lyrics to a Lady Gaga song which, let's be real, we've all done with our gay friends. Later, he divided the students up by sex and told the girls that they "would have mud on their wedding dresses" if they were not virgins at the time of their marriage. The presentation also featured pictures of aborted fetuses, because of course it did.

Though you could probably already guess most of the finer points, here's the You Can Run But You Cannot Hide International (YCRBYCHI) stance on homosexuality, written by Dean, taken from the ministry's official website:

The gay "movement" is part of a sexual revolution that has stripped sexuality of all moral significance for an entire generation. We cannot accept the physical prosecution of homosexuals and we cannot accept the proposal that homosexuality is either private or moral. Therefore, as Christians, we must wrestle with this human sin in order to preserve healthy, loving human sexuality for as many as possible.

Bradlee Dean, who famously sued Rachel Maddow for $50 million after alleging she misrepresented his stance on homosexuality, would also like to make it clear—like, seriously, perfectly perfectly clear—that, despite what you may have heard, he does not advocate the stoning of homosexuals in the street.

Let me make this perfectly clear — again. We are opposed to the state, in any country, no matter what its religious tradition, in executing homosexuals.

Dunkerton High School Superintendent Jim Stanton, who booked the Junkyard Prophet assembly, called a second meeting following the group's controversial appearance, to apologize to students. He later expressed continued surprise that the assembly took the turn that it did, telling local TV station KWWL:

Where did that come from? That's not what we were anticipating, and when we called the other schools where they had been… why wasn't that mentioned? […] We made a decision. It was a poor decision. And you know what? We're going to suffer the consequences of that decision. We're going to continue to do what we can to make it right.

Stanton has since proposed an "action plan" that includes creating a committee to pre-screen all future school performances (yeah duh), making counseling available for students, and trying to recover the money paid to the hate group's band.

Rock on, Dunkerton High. (Pre-screened rocking only.)