Jessica Simpson Would Like You to Know She's Pregnant, Horny, and Full of Amniotic Fluid

Jessica Simpson just loves being pregnant. She loves reveling in her womanly figure, predicting her future daughter's fashion sense, celebrating with big belly photo shoots, and indulging in those whacky cravings. But the thing that Jessica Simpson seems to love most of all? Discussing how being pregnant has turned her into a "fire hydrant" fart monster.

Here are six memorable quotes we can cherish long after little Maxwell Simpson Johnson has come into the world:

  • "I feel like I have a bowling ball sitting on my hoo ha...Apparently I have a lot of amniotic fluid, so whenever my water breaks it will be like a fire hydrant! [Jimmy Kimmel]
  • "I just started calling myself 'Swamp Ass. Like, I have swamp ass right now. I had major swamp ass because I was wearing these Spanx to hold in my gut… It's like the bayou up in that [area]." [Jay Leno]
  • "There is only one [baby], there is only one girl… But I did get knocked up by a baller ... A big football player." [Ellen DeGeneres]
  • "I am definitely ‘feeling intimate- and how! I'm kind of unstoppable right now. The Big O is, like, the biggest O ever!" [Ryan Seacrest]
  • "The average pregnant woman farts 15 times that! RT @OMGFacts The average person expels flatulence 15 times each day!" [Twitter]
  • "Stayed up past my bedtime. Now it's time for my big girl panties and sleeping bra!!" [Twitter]

[Image via Getty]