Are You Actually More Productive When Working From Home or Do You Just Lie About That?

Back on February 8th, a British telecommunications company let one quarter of its 12,000 employees work from home. The results of that experiment are in, and it seems that, basically, everything is more amazing when you can futz around in your pajamas all day instead of putting on clothing like a respectable human being.

Of the 3,000 people who work at O2's Slough office, only 125 "mission critical" aka "loser" employees remained chained to their desks on the day in question. 88% of employees who worked from home said they were at least as productive as they normally are in the office, while 36% claimed to have been even more productive. They also saved over $14,000 in commuting costs and spent a collective 1,000 extra hours "sleeping and relaxing," though the bulk of that was done by Frank in HR who slept for 950 hours.

Back at the office, electricity and water use were reduced by 12 and 53 percent, respectively, while gas use rose; The Telegraph speculates that this was due to the lack of body heat filling the building, which sort of makes it sound like a gross, dank cave.

It should be noted that Slough, the location of the guinea pig O2 office, is also the setting for the British version of the television show The Office, so it's possible that employees were more productive simply because they did not spend their day suffering constant interruptions at the hands of Ricky Gervais.

The "work from home" experiment was intended to serve as a trial run, ahead of the upcoming Olympics. The British government, increasingly concerned that London's public transportation system will be pushed beyond its limits this summer, as beautiful bronzed gods visiting from Brazil, Norway, and Valhalla take a break from beach volleyball tourneys to stuff themselves onto the tube in search of Top Shop sale merchandise, has already begun encouraging business to let their staff work from home over the course of the games.

So, is it better to work from home, if your job allows? I've composed, from the comfort of my bed, a small list of pros and cons to help evaluate the question.

  • Pro

    1. Don't have to see (or maybe even talk to) anyone, which is good because you are awkward in social situations anyway, awk-o.

    2. Time you would have spent commuting can be devoted to sleeping or masturbating or writing a thoughtful letter to a loved one.

    3. Can wear what you want, when you want. You tryna wear pajamas all day? Go for it. You tryna wear jeans? Okay, Kurt Cobain, haha, grunge, I get it; rock on. You tryna wear high-waisted lace booty shorts you bought on clearance even though they don't fit? If God is with you, who is against you?

    4. Don't have to worry about being discriminated against by ugly, jealous bitches who hate you because you're beautiful.

    5. Can whip yourself up some bœuf bourguignon for lunch, right from the comfort of your own kitchen.

    6. Emails, status updates, and general cooperation with your coworkers become optional. You don't have a boss. No man is your master. You are free to shuffle off those mortal coils and fly, fly, fly.

  • Con

    1. If you live alone, crushing feelings of isolation prompt you to make multiple trips to CVS just to be around other human beings. You may end up losing money on the deal. (Just remember: what you lose in money, you gain in ExtraBucks, and deep, personal relationships with the cashiers.)

    2. If you live with another human being already, be they a partner, a child, or a taciturn drifter you met off Craigslist, spending all day in captivity will make you hate them.

    3. Nothing to stop you from getting all wrapped up in personal chores, like doing the dishes or re-watching Season 1 of Game of Thrones.

    4. No flirty workplace romance. :(

    5. You don't know how to make bœuf bourguignon. For lunch, you eat a couple pickles straight from the jar while watching the Food Network.

    6. Though you may delude yourself into thinking otherwise, email, status updates, and general cooperation with your coworkers are actually not optional, and, also, you still have a boss.

  • If you are interested in a more thorough breakdown of the numbers related to the O2 trial run, check out this link from MobileEurope.

    If you are interested in working from home, my neighbor's step-sister makes $87/hour on the laptop. She has been out of work for 10 Months but last Month her income was $8478 just working on the laptop for some hours. Credit card needed.

    [Telegraph. // Image of Obama's home office via Getty]