Forget Rhett & Link and their pretend low-rent local ads: There are simply no substitutes for the real deal.
Take the Fashion Shack for instance. It's got the word "shack" in its name, so you know it's classy as fuck.
Pretty much the only thing preventing this future Clio Lifetime Achievement Award recipient from being perfect is an unauthorized cover of the B-52's "Love Shack" with rewritten lyrics like "the Fashion Shack is a little old place where we can get some dresses" and "off the rack, baby, at Fashion Shack."
Oh, and star wipes. Seriously, don't skimp on star wipes. They will pay for themselves by being a wipe shaped like a star.