CBS Throws Shade at ABC with Press Release Announcing Morbid Reality Show Called Dancing On The Stars

ABC may have been allowed to debut its Big Brother-esque reality show The Glass House this week, but CBS isn't quite finished making its displeasure known.

The Eye Network has just announced the development of a new dancing competition that sounds strikingly similar to one made popular by its long-time rival.

"Subsequent to recent developments in the creative and legal community, CBS Television today felt it was appropriate to reveal the upcoming launch of an exciting, ground-breaking and completely original new reality program for the CBS Television Network," begins CBS's ostensibly serious press release.

Entitled Dancing On The Stars (see what they did there?), the show will "be broadcast live from the Hollywood Forever Cemetery, and will feature moderately famous and sort of well-known people you almost recognize competing for big prizes by dancing on the graves of some of Hollywood's most iconic and well-beloved stars of stage and screen."

The press release continues:

"This very creative enterprise will bring a new sense of energy and fun that's totally unlike anything anywhere else, honest," said a CBS spokesperson, who also revealed that the Company has been working with a secret team for several months on the creation of the series, which was completely developed by the people at CBS independent of any other programming on the air. "Given the current creative and legal environment in the reality programming business, we're sure nobody will have any problem with this title or our upcoming half-hour comedy for primetime, POSTMODERN FAMILY."

"After all," the spokesperson added, "people who live in glass houses shouldn't throw stones."

Nice.

The Hollywood Forever Cemetery is, of course, a very real place, leaving open the possibility that this is not actually a joke.

Given that the two networks are essentially fighting over identical dystopian degrade-a-thons, one of which takes its name from a character in a novel about a world in which life is no longer worth living, I wouldn't put anything past them.