Intern Applicant: 'I Know This Is Unpaid But as a Personal Non-Negotiable, Money Is a Requirement'

The job situation is tough out there. Even more so for interns, who get to fight through all of the competition of getting a job, with none of the monetary reward. I guess it's understandable to try to be quirky, to stand out. It doesn't always work, though.

A West coast PR agency forwarded us this email that it got this week from a prospective intern. She was apparently not hired.

From: [Prospective intern]
To: [Prospective employer]
Subject: Highly Qualified

What's up. I'd like to start off saying that whatever you want...I have.
The odds of me even getting a response is hilarious.
I had better odds getting into really good colleges with my 2.7 declining GPA..

I have accumulated 4 years experience as a receptionist in boring ass office jobs.

I have worked in customer service accumulative of 4 years as well.

It was in retail and sucked because I would rather sit than stand for 8 hours at urban outfitters on the promenade.

Arranging shoes at 2 am in women's sales is basically slavery.

I am also a stand-up comedian, it's debatable wether or not I am even funny.

I'm attractive and will not send in my picture

because I stopped doing that at age 12 in AOL women on women chatrooms

Resume furnished upon request.

I know this is unpaid but as a personal non-negotiable, money is a requirement.

Eagerly wanting income and a really cool fucking job,

[Prospective intern]

She keeps it real. They should have hired her.

[Feel free to send any amusing intern emails here. Photo: Shutterstock.]