Law Schools Throwing Money at Anyone Desperate Enough to Attend Law SchoolS

Since the recession and the cruel pulling-out of the rug from under the notional feet of thousands of fresh-faced law school graduates who'd imagined office-bound lives of leisure in their futures, it's become quite clear to everyone that law school is for suckers. Nobody knows this better than people who run law schools. So what to do? Put themselves out of a job? Haha! No, but seriously, they can offer you a great deal on law school right now.

The WSJ reports that there has never been a better time to be a prospective law school student, in the sense that you're in a great bargaining position for scholarship money. (In the sense that your degree will not get you a useful job, there have been better times to be a prospective law school student.) Law school enrollment is down post-recession, but there are more law schools than ever, and, in their rush to fill up desks, the mighty centers of jurisprudence are essentially acting like a bunch of competing used-car salesman on a crowded but decrepit strip of highway just outside of town.

Enterprising or cash-strapped students have long negotiated with schools over the price of admission. But more than ever, schools are listening. For instance, the University of California at Los Angeles School of Law earlier this year sent letters to admitted students encouraging them to bargain. "We very much hope you find this offer competitive with others you have received," read one letter, dated March 2012 and reviewed by The Wall Street Journal. "Please let us know."

They may even be able to throw in a nice new set of floormats—absolutely free. The most hilarious part of all is that law schools refuse to just lower their sticker price, fearing loss of prestige (horse-out-of-barn-already alert!), so instead some of them just give scholarships to every single student they admit. This is similar to how I am such a valuable employee that I command a million-dollar annual salary, but I give most of it back to the company because hey, we're a team here.

In conclusion, don't go to law school.

[WSJ. Photo: Shutterstock]