Avid Pearl Jam fan and basketball-playing crazy person Dennis Rodman has just announced, via his agent, that he has written a book for kids titled Dennis the Wild Bull.
He has announced that signed copies are available for pre-order ($30) from wildrbull.blogspot.com.
He has announced that the book will "convey good lessons to children based on [his] own experiences has a world class athlete while overcoming obstacles as a child," which is gibberish.
What he has not announced is anything at all related to the specific plot of this book. For example: how the cartoon bull factors in.
Here's a line from what appears to be the book's official website (official .blogspot, anyway) that straight-up says no one knows anything about what is going on inside this tome of children's literature:
"While no details of the actual book are known, what we do know is [the authors] plan on making their official debut with the book in September 2012 at a venue undetermined and will embark on a worldwide tour making appearances across the United States, London, Germany, Australia, and Canada."
Rodman's co-author for the project is Dustin Warburton, who has also co-authored (which is to say: sole-authored) kids' books with two boxers. Before you ask, yes, he is the great-great nephew of that Cotton Warburton, who won the Academy Award for Best Film Editing in 1964. It says so right there in the opening line of his official biography.
The book will be illustrated by Dan Monroe, who acquired the nickname "Dragonbrush" (seemingly from himself?) while working at an airbrush t-shirt stand in Hawaii. According to Monroe's website, he may be related to Dracula.
Rodman won ABC's Celebrity Mole in 2004, so maybe his book will be kind of a cheat guide for winning Celebrity Mole. Or for becoming reacquainted with your estranged father which, the .blogspot notes (apropos of nothing), Rodman has recently done.
One thing the book will presumably not contain are lessons about Finnish wife-carrying races, as Dennis refused to compete in one in 2005, citing lack of proper training.
But he still has a lot of lessons to dole out.