Colorado Governor Issues Cheerful, Odd Press Release About His Collapsing Marriage

The Governor of Colorado, John Hickenlooper, announced today he is separating from his wife of ten years, Helen Thorpe.

The couple sound super jazzed about this break-up. They took the opportunity to invite people to invite them to social gatherings.

In a joint statement, the Governor and Ms. Thorpe begged everyone to keep including them both (start including them both, more likely) on the guest lists for cool, fun parties because they totally won't make it awkward seriously, any party, do you need them to bring anything? Do you need a designated driver? Do you need money for booze? A smoke machine? An exotic dancer? Whatever you need, you name it, they'll get it, no questions, no judgements, just please, please invite them.

Here's the line in question, from the first paragraph of their official statement:

Please feel free to include both of us in social gatherings as we will not find it awkward.

Elsewhere in the press release, the couple explains that, even though they're separating, pretty much nothing will change in their day-to-day interactions with each other.

They'll still spend "a great deal of time together," for instance. They'll be together for holidays. They'll be together for vacations. They'll "share meals often." They'll be out in the community "sometimes together, sometimes solo," sometimes with the man either one of them happens to be dating.

The couple even take a moment to assure the public that Colorado's summer of Hell is not to blame for their split.

To be honest, it really sounds like the separation announcement was just a means of getting the party invite heads-up out there.

The Hickenlooper-Thorpes are free, they are not awkward, and they would like to party.

[Denver Post // Image of Hickenloopers from their 2011 Christmas card via Denver Post]