God's most exquisite human, Stacey Dash, was hospitalized for "dehydration" (and maybe, a little bit, attention) early Tuesday morning, according to TMZ.
Dash's rep reported that the actress hadn't been able to hold down any food or liquids (read: virgins' blood) since Sunday night. Probably because the lowly foodstuffs deemed themselves unfit to be broken down by gastric acids in the stomach of such beauty.
According to the rep, Dash, actually the magicked form of an ancient sea serpent who spent thousands of years luring travelers to their watery graves until she fell in love with a human man, left behind her ocean lair, and, in 1995, appeared in the movie Clueless, is currently "at home on bed rest trying to get stronger."
Once she has regained her strength, Dash will explode into a thousand thousand-sided diamonds, her essence will soar to the heavens, and she will at last claim her rightful throne in the celestial pantheon of the Old Gods.
She looks great for 46.