Country female Taylor Swift continued her frantic, clumsy scramble up the New England social ladder last weekend, crashing a Kennedy wedding and refusing to leave when the bride's mother asked her to.
The Boston Herald spoke to Victoria Gifford Kennedy, wife of the late Michael Kennedy (son of RFK) and mother of the bride, Kyle. Vicki confirmed that she, personally, asked Taylor Swift to leave because her garish rural-ness was offending the Kennedys:
"[Conor and Taylor] texted me an hour before the wedding and asked if they could come. I responded with a very clear, ‘Please do not come.' They came anyway. ... I personally went up to Ms. Swift, whose entrance distracted the entire event, politely introduced myself to her, and asked her as nicely as I could to leave. It was like talking to a ghost. She seemed to look right past me."
Swift, the ghost of a Confederate war widow who died 130 years ago, began dating Conor Kennedy, 18, earlier this summer while waiting for her husband Jedediah to return home from the War of Northern Aggression.
Swift's spokeswoman, who likely knew more about the wedding details than the mother of the bride, told the Herald that Victoria Gifford Kennedy was a goddamn liar because Taylor Swift was so invited:
"Taylor was invited to the wedding and the bride thanked her profusely for being there."
For future reference: Just because someone is not openly rude to you does not mean they are thrilled to have you at their wedding. And for Taylor Swift's very own refrence, from her song "Speak Now": "I am not the kind of girl / Who should be rudely barging in on a white veil occasion."
Vicki explained that Conor was invited to the wedding but never RSVP'd (because he is a thoughtless Millennial).
News outlets and popular teens reported seeing Taylor and Conor holding hands in Hyannis, Mass., last week.