Ab Circle Pro? More Like Fat, Gurgle, SlowS

It seems damn hard to get in shape these days. First, Americans were devastated to learn that LapBandVip.com billboards would not turn them into fitness models; now, in another crushing blow to people who want to exercise in their living rooms with a bare minimum of effort and subsequently bear a strong resemblance to John Basedow, it seems the Ab Circle Pro is not the magical device that was promised.

The FTC just hit the companies that sold and marketed the Ab Circle Pro with a $25 million judgment, to pay back some of the poor, wishful fools who believed that swooshing back and forth 90 degrees on a circular piece of plastic would give them the type of abs that are actually achieved by extreme dieting and the heavy use of diuretics. From the WSJ:

The FTC also took aim at fitness celebrity Jennifer Nicole Lee, who endorsed the device. Ms. Lee said she lost 80 pounds and was crowned Ms. Bikini Diva "all thanks to the Ab Circle Pro." ... she is permanently barred from asserting that the device significantly contributed to her weight loss or physical fitness.

Ab Circle Pro? More Like Fat, Gurgle, SlowS

The real way to look like Jennifer Nicole Lee is, of course, to sell your soul to Satan. Rather cheaply.

The real way to get in shape is, of course, squats.

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