Heidi Klum and Seal Break Down and Give The Internet the Bitter Divorce Bloodbath it Craves

When the Tom Cruise/Katie Holmes divorce wrapped up quickly, quietly, and without much fuss, the Internet, unexpectedly starved for blood, became weak and irritable.

Thankfully, Heidi Klum and Seal have decided to let their marriage go down in a great big ball of flames, purely for strangers' amusement.

Radar reports that the couple are sparring over Seal's decision to use personal photos of their children (Leni, 8; Henry, 6; Johan, 5; and Lou, 2) in advertisements for a digital camera without Klum's permission.

Half of the children's genes come from Heidi Klum so, legally, Seal could only photograph those chromosomes that his sperm provided. (Leni's chromosomes come from Klum and an Italian businessman. Seal was present at Leni's birth and has since adopted her.)

Klum hired a lawyer to demand the camera company remove the video featuring images of the kids from its website. It has since been made private.

According to an anonymous "insider" quoted by Radar, Seal argued that it was up to him to use his personal photos as he wished.

The rose kisser had previously challenged Klum's request for primary physical custody of the children, asking instead that they both be granted equal time.

He also reportedly contested Klum's claim that there were no joint assets to be divided up.

Seal has an estimated net worth of $15 million. Klum is worth $70 million, and is close friends with Tim Gunn, which is worth easily another $2 million.

The Internet was shocked when the couple announced their divorce in January, having long since arbitrarily decided that their marriage was "one of the good ones."

[Radar // Image via Getty]