Proving that your worst doctor experience probably isn't so bad after all, Army veteran Michael Nash is suing the federal government for $10 million after a Veterans Administration nurse allegedly left ice packs his penis for too long, causing frostbite and, eventually, partial dick amputation.
According to Larry Jones, Nash's attorney, a nurse packed ice on Nash's penis for 19 hours, which, yeah, sounds like that would cause some frostbite.
"It basically caused frostbite on his penis, which eventually caused gangrene," Jones said. "In addition to robbing someone of their manhood, they've robbed him of the simple ability to urinate just like every other person who lives in this world."
But, as penis frostbite tales are wont to do, the story gets weirder. Apparently, the initial surgery – not the one to repair the frostbitten dick – was for a "penile implant and circumcision." It's at this point that it becomes worth mentioning that, at the time of the initial surgery, Nash was 59 years old.
As strange as it is for a 59-year-old to be getting a penis implant and a circumcision, it still doesn't excuse what sounds like a horrific case of malpractice.
"It's about the most blatant medical malpractice error one could make," Jones said. "It's a senseless tragedy that should never have happened."
Jones added: "I would not wish this on my worst enemy."
Naturally, the Department of Veterans Affairs denies any wrong doing.