The unemployment rate has dipped below 8 percent for the first time since 2009 — evidence of a slow, but steady recovery? Or evidence that hundreds of thousands of unemployed Democrats gathered together to lie about being employed?
Everyone should gather around and be quiet, because we're witnessing one of God's miracles: the birth of a conspiracy theory. And former General Electric CEO Jack Welch is its St. Paul (or its John the Baptist?):
Welch, who is retired, is apparently "in meetings" all day today and can't comment. But he's getting backup from elected officials/accused war criminals:
And television hosts:
But just cooking the books is a kind of boring conspiracy. This, from Washington Examiner writer Conn Carroll, is a much better, and more fun conspiracy theory:
Unfortunately, Carroll's flavor of the conspiracy hasn't taken root. But the general sense that the numbers produced by the Bureau of Labor Statistics — a government agency that currently has no political appointees (due in part to the currently-blocked nomination of Erica Groshen, known Jewish Summer Camp attendee) — have been faked or cooked is overwhelming:
The conservatives on Twitter join a proud tradition of questioning the BLS statistics, a proud tradition dating back to Richard Nixon. But you know what Nixon would've done if he thought the numbers were juked? Richard Nixon would've appointed an agency Jew-counter. Hopefully Big Journalism and the Daily Caller are up for the job.