It's Best to Just Pretend the Economy Doesn't Exist

Corporate insiders are overwhelmingly betting on a stock market decline. Well, of course they are. As the head of Alcoa told his investors, "The market today is basically driven by headlines and not market fundamentals." And the headlines are fundamentally bad.

The IMF just called the risk for a new global recession "alarmingly high." Is that a headline? As corporations indulge in a feast of cheap money, escalating numbers of homeless people spill out of New York City shelters, and banks are robbed for a single dollar. Though the world's economic engines may be sputtering collectively towards stagnation, Goldman Sachs can always buy itself a new president to watch out for its interests in the wooly global political marketplace. No need to fret over social security's instability; our elderly citizens have earned the right to continue working long past age 65. So don't worry too much, Americans. The fiscal cliff will fuck you very, very gently.

Read it and weep.

[Photo: Charlie Cowins/ Flickr]