How to Survive Interrogation Using Only Your Dick

If you are ever captured by an enemy, and interrogated using the very latest mind control technique, and you have a dick, pay close attention to what you are about to read here.

This is from an interview with a former (1960s-era) British interrogator, by the author Dominic Streatfeild:

But the technique that all of us in Aden listened to agape was a method that had been developed allegedly very recently, which was to suspend the prisoner in a tank of liquid gelatine which was at 94.8 degrees Fahrenheit. Naked. With your arms and legs tied and your head encased in a sort of diver's helmet, through which you were breathing. You were hung into this tank, so all you could hear was the [breathing noise] of your own breath. And in theory you would go bonkers. Because you didn't know which way was up, you had no sense.

How to survive this potential brain-scrambling experience?

But they said ‘Don't worry!' ‘Don't worry!' they said. ‘This is what the guys who practise this haven't thought about: they have deprived you of all sort of external sensory capability, but the male person has one very sensitive organ – between his legs – over which, under this circumstance, it has been proved, you still have control. So the answer is concentrate on your dick – and you can do all sorts of amazing things in a tank of gelatine at 98.4 degrees! It's actually a very amenable environment.'

We just need to figure out what that means.

[Dominic Streatfeild via MetaFilter. Photo: Keegan/ Flickr]