Donald Trump's "October Surprise" turned out to be a dud: A lame offer, which Trump would most likely back out of, to donate $5 million to the charity of President Obama's choice if he releases his college records and a copy of his passport.
More like October Snoozeprise.
But over at the Colbert Report, Stephen offers to save Trump's "game-changing" announcement by counter-offering with a bargain that would be both a huge surprise and a major game-changer if accepted.
For a donation of $1 million to the charity of Trump's choice, the blackmailing billionaire must submit his mouth to a dipping from Colbert's balls.
"Nothing would make me happier than to write this check," said Colbert. "And nothing would make America happier than have something going into your mouth than coming out of it."
And let us say amen.
[screengrab via Colbert Nation]