I mean, look at this guy. He's got legs like a German track cyclist and a chest like a beer keg. He clearly has hair extensions and those are a major turn-off, but I'll let that slide. Seriously, look at him! Prance, you sexy beat! Or radish, sorry. So much blood has left my head and rushed into my penis that I'm clearly disoriented. But o my heaven, radish man I'm yours and enter me sideways or in my mouth I don't care just do it now before anything below the belt turns blue.

[Via SFWeekly, images from Twitter]