What Is Sexy: A Victoria's Secret Guide

Every year, millions of Americans forget what is Sexy.

A hand on the hip—is that sexy? Kind of. A water bottle on its side—is that sexy? It could be I guess. A kitten who is malicious—no. A kitten who is naughty—definitely.

Thankfully, we have the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show, lingerie's annual celebration of the vague shape of a wing, to tell us what is sexy.

Here is what is sexy, according to this year's runway show:

What Is Sexy: A Victoria's Secret Guide

SEXY IS: Shrinking down so you're smaller than a clover and dressing like your great grandfather.


What Is Sexy: A Victoria's Secret Guide

SEXY IS: Wrapping yourself in a tiger because you're on fire.


What Is Sexy: A Victoria's Secret Guide

SEXY IS: All of the cheerleaders exploding behind you.


What Is Sexy: A Victoria's Secret Guide

SEXY IS: The moon at Christmas.


What Is Sexy: A Victoria's Secret Guide

SEXY IS: Being strangled to death by a serpent in your bra.


What Is Sexy: A Victoria's Secret Guide

SEXY IS: A hula hooping dog who is bad.


What Is Sexy: A Victoria's Secret Guide

SEXY IS: A girl who's a bug.


What Is Sexy: A Victoria's Secret Guide

SEXY IS: Being a stamen inside a flower.


What Is Sexy: A Victoria's Secret Guide

SEXY IS: Blowing kisses to angry emails.

What Is Sexy: A Victoria's Secret Guide

SEXY IS: An amateur sweeper.


What Is Sexy: A Victoria's Secret Guide

SEXY IS: Confused by the assignment.


What Is Sexy: A Victoria's Secret Guide

SEXY IS: Keeping your shoulders dry.


What Is Sexy: A Victoria's Secret Guide

SEXY IS: The naughtiest clown.


What Is Sexy: A Victoria's Secret Guide

SEXY IS: The biggest hat.


What Is Sexy: A Victoria's Secret Guide

SEXY IS: Deez Nutz United States


What Is Sexy: A Victoria's Secret Guide

SEXY IS: Saluting our troops.


What Is Sexy: A Victoria's Secret Guide

SEXY IS: Impaling yourself on a children's bicycle.


What Is Sexy: A Victoria's Secret Guide

SEXY IS: Forgetting where you left the pinwheels.


What Is Sexy: A Victoria's Secret Guide

SEXY IS: A young boy staring at your tits.

That is sexy.

[Images via Getty; Justin Bieber image via AP]