But Gervais isn't his normal smug, obnoxious, and atheism-promoting self in this piece. He's, dare we say, earnest here? His new sense of naive wonderment had us wondering if Gervais wasn't really a comedian at all, but really a disguised millennial writer, akin to the ones from the "me-centric angst dump," Thought Catalog.
Is Ricky Gervais a 20-something hiding in plain sight? There's some major proof here.
"When dairy cows are let out of the barns in spring, after a long winter of dried feed and artificial lights, they play by jumping around and rolling in the grass, before they start grazing, because they are so happy and excited to be back in a field. That's me, every time I land in New York. I can't believe my luck. I live and work here."
Oh gee, Ricky just can't wait to get off the plane in New York. It's like a Sex and the City episode come to life!
"When The New York Times asked me if I'd write something, I was flattered."
Oh so the Paper of Record asked him without warning to write a large piece for the publication with no previous experience. Sounds like nepotism. DUNHAM'ED.
"This was my chance to cut my nose off to spite my face, and instead of getting into a beautiful air-conditioned Mercedes, I decided to hail a yellow cab and risk my life and hence teach humanity a lesson. I got in and buckled up. As I expected, it was like being in Tron.
The driver was swearing to himself in a strange Eastern European accent, and at one point he took me up a quiet cobbled street."
Thinking that you're risking your life by taking a cab in New York is one of the most naive things that a "New Yorker" has ever said. Buck up buttercup and stop slamming cab drivers for their accents.
"From there, my girlfriend and I went to dinner with the Seinfelds and Jake Gyllenhaal. This is a typical day in New York - by which I mean there is no such thing."
"Of all the things that have happened in my life, I'd say that living in New York is the closest thing to a dream coming true."
Barf. Too saccharine.
"In the mid-'70s, one show in particular, "Rhoda," gave me an adrenaline rush - the thought that one day I might leave the nest and head to a bigger, scarier, more exciting city."
Nostalgia is one of the hallmark traits of being a millennial. Rugrats. Nickelodeon. Rhoda. N64. You can hardly even tell the difference.
"So what was the moment I really fell in love with New York? It was during the filming of my first lead role in a movie, "Ghost Town."...Then I saw every shop and home transform into a wonderland around Thanksgiving in time for Christmas. Then there was basically a lot of eating. Perfect."
A lot of eating you say? So you're a dreaded "foodie," huh? Also, the fact that you don't attribute misery and loneliness to Christmas in New York just proves that you're 20-years-old.
Ricky Gervais, basically just an NYU freshman at this point.
[Image via AP]